Whoa Buddy! That's a Big No No!

So I had to get money to do my laundry. I went to the bank across the mall to the ATM. Well, it's being serviced so I couldn't use it and trying to go through the drive-thru is a pain in the royal butt! So I had two choices 1. Go to another branch(which is just SO out of the way!) or 2.Gird up my loins and tackle Target(to buy some stupid thing like a pack of gum to get cash back).
So guess which option I chose? Anyone? WRONG! Convenience won out, who would've thought?

After several minutes of pep talk, and musings on the likelihood of seeing someone I knew, I braced myself to walk into Target. Picture it: Not showered for the day, still in pajamas (green plaid cropped pants and a purple hoodie...all my "normal" pajamas were in the aforementioned dirty laundry), hair not even combed(kind of patted down for a quick car drive...but certainly not public worthy), cowlick hanging up the back, my lovely fashion accessory of a shoe (see here for explanation of that), complete with a black sock under the ace bandage... Oh! And bra-less!

So I steal Jana's hair elastic, and leave her in the car as I hobble into Target in all my glory! After a quick unsuccessful search for chocolate oranges I head to the check out. As I'm standing in line waiting for the douche of a lady in front me to hurry her feebleness along I realize my non-broken leg has hair peeking out(I had shaved my "broken" leg last week for the trip to the ER. You don't know what good looking Doctors/X-ray Techs/Janitors will be roaming the hallways). And it's full on making it's self known to any customer with in a five mile radius.

Anyway, as I'm hobbling out of the store Jana text's me and asks if I got kidnapped. I replied with, "Yes, Goodwill picked me up for looking homeless." Not a proud moment indeed!